Writer M.D. Thalmann takes a look inward
Writer M.D. Thalmann takes a look inward.
Now that everyone’s getting settled comfortably into 2016, it’s a fair guess to say that people have also crept back into their habits from last year, regardless of any resolutions they might’ve made.
I heard a message recently that stuck with me, and I’m going to share it with you: Instead of resolving to do something, it’s better to resolve to be something. For me this means setting up specific “be” bullet points to hit on a daily basis.
BE UNDERSTANDING
The first and I think the most important one is that I’m not going to get offended by things that aren’t offensive. A wise man once told me that just because something offends you doesn’t mean that it’s offensive. Likewise, while something can seem insulting (depending on the perspective, most things can be construed as insulting if you’re looking to be insulted), you can instead take the stance that people aren’t out to personally offend you. For example, when I explain to the salesman at Men’s Warehouse, “I don’t like skinny ties,” and he says, “Here are the fat ones,” I don’t have to go onto social media and make the world agree to call them “wide ties” from now on. My body image issues are just that, my issues.
BE PRODUCTIVE
Another thing that I find myself doing is wasting time. I need to tell myself on a daily basis to spend each hour to the fullest. It’s really helpful to map out my entire day and constantly look at the clock. In the modern world, a lot of us no longer wear a watch, but I think that if we did we would quickly become aware of how much time we waste. For example, since the advent of social media we spend 300 percent more time on the toilet. Why? (And, this is a bit gross when you think about it.) Most of us take our phones into the loo. Just think about how much wasted time (and germs) we’d avoid by nixing phones in bathrooms.
BE REASONABLE
I want to take a stand on common sense. It seems we’ve gotten away from that as a society. I cannot control others, so I’ll just say that I’m going to use common sense again. For example, if someone greets me with a salutation of their religious holiday, I will not assume they mean to discredit my beliefs. Instead, I will say “thank you.” Especially since we’re entering into a fierce political presidential season, it’s good to remember, just because someone voted for “that other guy” doesn’t mean they’re a buffoon, heartless, or worse. People are different and it takes all kinds.
BE BOLD
Next up, it’s time to start taking chances. Practically no one I know is fulfilling his or her potential. Most of us haven’t landed a dream job where we do what we truly love or tackled big goals. We’re corporate slaves, most of us. While I’m good at the corporate gig, I’ve yet to risk utter failure in an attempt to figure out all of the things I cannot do, which means I still haven’t figured out all the things I can do. When I’ve figured this out, I’ll have it made.
BE PRESENT
Last but not least, I want to be present. Solid friendships and a good life require some active participation and I find myself lacking in that department. Even unshakable relationships need to be fed and watered from time to time. So, I’m putting down the phone, the social media, and the pressing extraneous commitments, to focus on life.
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